Friday, October 20, 2006

I was reading today on one of the discussion forums I'm on about how one of the posters thought her neighbors might be abusing their child and felt she should contact child services but didn't want to create trouble for them if there wasn't really a problem, because maybe she was mistaken about what she heard, and after all everyone has bad days and maybe they were just going through a rough patch. I hate it when I hear this kind of stuff. I understand you don't want to be in the uncomfortable position of reporting a neighbor or friend or family member but it's a lot less comfortable to be little and unable to do so. If you're wrong, you're wrong and Child Services will be happy to have a case where NOTHING was wrong for a change. If you're right, you just may save someones life.

All this made me dig out a poem:

I am a child who was like you were.
I am a child who could be like your own.
I am a child unlike you were.
I am a child unlike your own.
I am the silent, haunted eyes
peering out from behind the windows.
Mistrustful. Wary. World weary.
I am the little girl who hides her tears behind her smiles,
grasping at straws of normality,
weaving them to cloak myself.
I am the moment of fear, as I flinch from the hand
I should be able to trust most.
I am knowledge beyond my years,
I know the real monsters wear human faces.
I am the keening sound of powerlessness,
kept captive by my blood.
Your thoughts of not intruding,
his badge, his masquerade.
I see your too polite and nervous smiles,
like grins on a skeletons face.
I hear your whispers and I know
that glimmer of knowledge in your eyes.
You know. I know. Still it goes on.
I have seen the belt flash.
I have known time to slow.
I have seen the curled lip and puckered brow,
his face contorted in fury.
I have known dangling off the ground,
suspended like a fish on a stringer.
The neck, the pressure of a grip,
the blaring silent loudness
and the sudden sweet pain as it drips.
Crimson. Clouding eyes rolling back,
twitching and tremors.
I am Shame,
his anger must be my fault, must be deserved.
Else why would you turn from my aid?
Why do you fail ot look me in the eye?
If you know it is wrong and you know it goes on
why should YOU flinch? I haven't struck a blow.
Why am I always here and alone?
I am a child. A child who was like you were,
a child who could be like your own.
But I will never be a child like you were,
I will never be a child like your own.
I am just me. And I'm better off alone.

Sorry to go dark and dramatic on you folks but PLEASE fercrisakes, if you suspect abuse report it! You just may be the voice a child doesn't have in an adult ruled world.

In happier news, I had a good day. Nothing huge, just lots of little goodnesses. *G* Got quite a bit done, got the tiles for the hearth, found a fire place mantel so we can take our 2 antique ones with us, got Sierra's transfer (AKC to VCA) mailed, got a bag of free cat litter with the cats food as a promotional and got Cade a new padded harness for Tracking... it's purple... and spiffy! Last but not least I got to attend a great auction today... not that I could BUY anything but I was just there to keep an eye on market prices for items I want when I can afford them. If you're interested in antiques, auctions are a great place to LEARN about them so you don't screw up when you buy. *G* And yes, as I've been told, I'm a bizare 25 year old I know. Lots of folks need to tell me that. But I just llooovvveee antiques! Today they had 5 estates from folks who apparently had LOTS of disposable income to buy high quality stuff before they passed away... high quality stuff within drooling range. ;-) Going to another one tomorrow to drool over few gorgeous items I can't afford but certainly will enjoy seeing up close! :-)

1 comment:

Kristie said...

I understand completely where you are coming from in regards to the abuse etc... (especially having been a child of abuse)...

BUT... False allegations are NOT wiped from your record. You can be found not guilty, not doing anything wrong, but the fact you were investigated remains on your file with child protection...

People have been reported for sexually abusing their child when all it was was nappy rash... and yet it stays on their record...