The House

Today was the day we were supposed to hear from the agent on how the meeting with the home's owners went. I spent all day half-hoping, half-imagining I'd get an estatic call from Nic saying he'd got the call and had good news, the house was ours and what a lovely belated birthday present.

Time ticked by until Nic was off work - no call. Nic came home and still nothing. Either it was bad news or Nic was going to pull out a bottle of bubbly. I watched him trying to gauge if he was upset or hiding excitement. Dinner came and went, no bubbly, no announcement. Finally I broke and asked him if he'd heard from the real estate agent or not. He did. The owners weren't interested. Even with the extra offer. He'll keep us in mind, keep an eye out for something that matches our needs blah, blah, blah. Whatever. Who cares. I know I need to care because I need to find a house and I can't just hang myself up on this but right now, for this moment... I really don't care and I can't bring myself to either.

So. That's that. I'd love to go back in time and strangle myself for not moving on the property faster. I wanted to wait so we didn't seem too eager and inflate the price. Yeah, I couldn't have known, yadda, yadda... but the fact remains if I'd just moved on it straight away, the contract would have been signed and we'd have a home.

So we're back to looking. There is literally not a single house in the market I'm even remotely interested in and I've been haunting the real estate websites. Now we've got to consider what happens if we don't find a place in time. Do we rent until we find a place? I have no idea how to find a place that lets you have multiple animals or where or if you can rent without having to be in contracts for a set period or what the fees are like for breaking contract and moving early. Or do we settle somewhere that's got a decent house but not enough land for what I want and move later. Both ideas gall me, the later in particular. And if we're going to settle in a house without the land I want, should we just stick somewhere in the inner burbs where it's better for N & L or still be in the country but without the country? Or do we consider other reigons completely... but it's still got to be close enough to the city and transport for Nic, close enough that I can take L to school, close enough to training and eventually to classes for myself etc. Too many things to consider and weigh and my head is spinning with matters I thought I'd settled when we found this house and put in the offer.

What compromises do you make when no compromises are acceptable?