Tuesday, July 11, 2006

rambling, rambling, darn I'm SURE I have a point somewhere...

The past several days Laurent has been just generally clingy, easily irritated and very, very, very tired because he's been missing day naps. Usually he goes down at 11am and then about 3-4ish. The past several days though, I'll get him to nod off and about 15 minutes after I set him down he wakes up bawling. I know it's probably just teething and we've tried the Bauers drops and even tried Dimadon at one point... no dice. Combine this with his new-found mobility and desire to be into ev-er-y-th-in-g but worrying if I move a single inch away and the fact we're in no-one-but-mum-will-do stage (including dad, even if mum is not 2 inches away) and there have been some moments I've really wished he'd plleaasseee just take a nap so I could have 10 minutes whinge-free time to grab a tea and relax!

Still... this is *such* a cute age with all the stuff he's starting to do now. I am in love with the look of a crawling baby bum. Especially when he kicks in the afterburner when he really wants to get something. Not so cute? Today 'something' was the sooty fireplace. He looked like a chimney sweep! He's also started to give kisses as well but hasn't figured out we close our mouths when we kiss him so his are open-mouthed and drooly, frequently with little bits of apple or pear or whatever he's been eating recently. LOL

Training wise, fluency is being a bug-a-boo with Sierra at the moment. We've got the behaviour in question on cue but it's not fully fluent and I can't get her past whatever the roadblock is to get it more fluent than about 65-70%.

So the question begs, where is it breaking down?

Is my timing off, even a itty bit, so she's not getting a concise idea of what it is I want to keep progressing? Possible. My Meniere's tends to mean there is a bit of lag time between thought and action. Did I attach the cue to early and the behaviour wasn't fully clear and precise in her head? Hnn. An issue of maturity or confidence? Mayyyybee. I could see that. Is she anticipating the cue, be it hand signal or verbal and only getting the first part (ex. Acting on "s" sound instead of waiting to hear the -it, -ractch, -pin etc. before flinging herself into whatever was recently reinforced but that could just reflect lack of clarity of the criteria for her. Hnn... this seems most likely to me but I'm not sure this is the cause so much as a factor of it. Actually, come to think of it, I'm actually not entirely sure I didn't just click the wrong thing... did I click the action or the motion? May just be onto something there!

I think I need to video tape it and replay it in slow-motion to see exactly what is going on and start actually charting and monitoring with quantifyable measurements instead of just eyeballing it. Lazy trainer...

Stuff to ponder on... later, though, bubs is done eating...

Okay, moving along, I'm not sure if I'm supposed to answer comments in the comments section or in the bloggy bit but *shrugs* it's my blog and I'm answering here.

Kate TBH it was your post on AB that prompted this as the topic d'jour. It'd been kicking around before but it just kind of came to a head yk?

Loz: That would definitely be great to get recomendations and would love to talk more with you about this and your experiences! Happy bday btw if I don't see you before then!

Sif: I think that's one of the fundamental differences in how I train. It's like how you can do AP things (sling, ex BF, GD etc) but AP is more than it's components, it's a philosophy and way of thinking about child rearing yk?

You've done some EC w. Bryn right? I keep meaning to look into it more but I remember thinking it sounded like what I do with pups, so tell me if this sounds similar? (This is my protocol for teaching pups to eliminate outside and eventually hold it inside.)

Don't destroy their innate desire to be clean by forcing them to acclimate to being dirty or restore it if they've been acclimated. Be aware of their bodies rhythms and signals. Don't ask for more than they're physiologically/mentally capable of. Give opportunities when they signal to go in the desired location. Make it enjoyable and safe to do so. Attach a cue ("potty-potty"). As they become able to control their bodies they'll go in the desired location when they need to go because it's got a history of being a good place to go and they're not conditioned to go in areas that look/feel/smell different - like the house. This starts from day 1 in the whelping box by encouraging mum to keep them clean (mum potties them by stimulating them to go) and changing bedding the second I see any wee or poo on it. (This is far more often than typical, most breeders will lay down several layers of 'soaker' and a fleece top liner to absorb any wee/poo, changing it 1x day or every other day avg. My goal is I never want them to think being in wee/poo is the norm, the equiv of sitting in a wet/dirty nappy.) I don't expect a pup to be reliably fully house-trained till about 6-9 months old, they are managed before that to ensure positive experiences in the potty area, until they're capable of holding it. This doesn't mean I have pups having accidents till they're 6-9 months old. I've had no more than 3 housetraining accidents with any pup (and only one pup had 3, most have 1-2) because of careful management and supervising. But IF I miss and there is an accident, it's dealt with by quietly calling the puppy outside to offer a chance to go in the potty spot if it has anything else to do, then clean up while someone else supervises pup. At no point is the puppy corrected or shown disapproval in any way because attaching any sort of negative emotional response to it only creates the idea that they should hide going or avoid you watching them go. (Ever hear of a puppy who went behind the couch or went the second you looked away after you'd been watching them like a hawk?) No way do I want that or my pup thinking it shouldn't go in front of me... major PITA if you're traveling, at the vets etc. and have to potty them on-lead standing right next to them!) I've been doing this since I was 12 or 13 years old as we had rescue pups often enough - long, long before I ever heard of EC or thought about potty training a child.

If you don't mind me asking (if not, that's fine!) and are still reading... is it the actual idea of using a method that happens to also be used/work for animals that was offensive or that there were some pretty unkind judgements on Erik, yourself and your parenting implied in FIL's statement with a rather blunt assertion you needed force the issue and train him the 'right' way, presumably using methods that weren't in keeping with your beliefs?

Anyhow, dinner needs making. Ciao!

PS My cuties!

(Cade doesn't exist during winter to be photographed, he was hiding under a doona, which is his fav thing to do! LOL

1 comment:

loz said...

i will PM you some names and happy to listen and talk anytime:D