Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Warning: Long rant, best to just ignore...

Today I am really kind of very mixed up...

The day started out really good, we had a great night of sleep (blessed sleep!) after L's chiro treatment with only one waking at 5 am for a feed. I still can't believe that! He slept really well during the day as well, a solid 2 hour nap in the morning which has happened seldom enough I can count the instances on one hand! We're going to see the chiro again tomorrow for a follow-up. I got a lot of cleaning done while he was asleep so I was feeling really good about my nice clean house, as I'm a neat freak even if I do live with a man who is the polar opposite and have accepted a lot of messy-clutter following Laurent's birth. Then

Okay, now that THAT is out and vented, I did have an otherwise really good day. Laurent is just such a love that even when I’m royally P.O’ed at Nic, I am just overjoyed with him. I just love him so much... his chubby little rolls, his cheeky grin, absolutely everything about him is PERFECT! I love him, I love him, I love him!!!!!!!!!!!!! Besides that, he was happy, well rested and his tummy wasn’t hurting (I love the chiro!) Plus I got in some training with the dogs, got the house cleaned up and I went to the resale shop to see if our stuff had been sold (it had) and Laurent found this little Fisher-Price piano thingie he went so nuts over I got it for him. He loovvvveeesss it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He literally banged on it (he knows how to use buttons just fine) the whole way home burbling and laughing in delight and continued for almost a solid hour till nap time! I think that'll probably be the best $4.20 I've spent for a while! I love doing stuff to make him happy! *squishies my little munchkin* Then when we got home we had FLUFFY MAIL! I'd ordered 3 bubblebubs a few weeks back and we got them today... a funky cows print a rocking horse one and one of the new rainbow collection side-snappers. They're all really nice of course but the rainbow one is YUMMY! So soft! So pretty! So fluffy! It's almost a shame to put it on his bum... LOL

You know, going back to the whole rant about DH's hobby, I think part of my resentment towards it is not only all of the things I said before (and those are VERY real) but also the fact that since moving to Australia I've had to give up both of my hobbies pretty much entirely. They just don't really exist here, or at least not anywhere NEAR us... they'd both require 2-3 hour drives each way to go to weekly practice and there's no room for daily practice either which you pretty much need if you intend to actually do them, which I didn't know before I moved here and I do resent being forced to give up. Initially Nic had talked about how we could look at moving out a ways but then he pulls the whole, "Well I like the city and I'll be miserable but whatever..." martyr bit and there are the practical considerations as far as his job, commute time and Laurent's schooling. I still have really mixed feelings about having to give up two things which I basically defined my life by for years just to move here with him. I love Australia... I wouldn't want to move back to the US for anything... but I hate that I had to give up these things to be here and by extension give up a major part of myself. I've tried to find other interests but there's nothing really to take their places.

Okay, well this seriously counts as a novel length post and I'm still really mixed up and could ramble on for ages more but it’s 10:30 so it’s time for bed for me... maybe sleep will improve my ability to think everything out.

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